Memorial Day

In the United States we dedicate the last Monday of May in honor of all American soldiers killed in combat throughout our history. First celebrated nation-wide in May of 1868 after America’s bloody Civil War, Memorial Day attained official national holiday status by a congressional declaration in 1971. Today many Americans view Memorial Day as a kick-off to the summer season – a three day weekend for camping, boating, parades, festivals, and home cook-outs. In a moment of reflection some might also pause to consider the 627,000 Americans whose lives were snuffed out in military combat. Each year I’m one of those who, while being thankful for the courageous sacrifices paid by those defendants of American ideals, can’t help but wonder, “Who’s to blame for this carnage?”

Of all the bad things that happen in life, war may be the most difficult to truly understand. Ordinary people all over the world share much more in common than any ideological differences they may possess. They all raise families whom they love, they all strive for some kind of happy existence, they all want to feel respected. What drives them to hate each other to the point of mass slaughter? I must confess I find it hard not to blame the rulers of the opposing forces. Those who initiate war in order to expand an empire or propagate an ideological belief seem pretty blameworthy for the ensuing destruction. But waging war all by oneself is a difficult proposition. What dynamics convince a collection of ordinary people to assault a neighboring country or tribe, or even to turn upon their own people in civil war? Such hatred is often spawned by blame. We blame the “enemy” for their failure to honor our chosen religious deity, for their immoral way of life, for their undeserved wealth and conspicuous consumption, for their disregard of civil rights, for trying to undermine our economic stability, for adulterating our race, for spreading their ideology, or for resisting our ideology. It is our own willingness to be caught up in these kinds of blame that provide the political, financial, and human support necessary to wage war.

You might respond that half of those killed in war are defending themselves from aggression, and I can buy that argument to some extent. But history has shown that the best defense is more aggression than the opposition can muster. So when Pearl Harbor was attacked by the Japanese fleet in 1941, the result was escalating aggression that concluded with the nuclear annihilation of two entire Japanese cities. On that week in August of 1945 millions of Americans at home were routinely going about their business, and I doubt most of them were feeling particularly threatened by the residents of Hiroshima or Nagasaki. But they clearly blamed Japan for the war in the Pacific and had developed sufficient hatred to self-justify the horrible toll in human life.

As long as humanity wages war, we will need courageous soldiers willing to risk their lives in preservation of the principles our societies deem essential. And it is right that we honor those who have made that ultimate sacrifice on the battlefield. A “Memorial Day” should be a solemn moment of recognition. But let us also contemplate how we can allow ourselves to develop the animosity needed to wage war against others – others who are, at their core, so much like ourselves. Without that aggression memorial days would not be needed.

Welcome!

Over the past 50 years I’ve watched with interest as people blamed other people for maladies ranging from running out of peanut butter in the home cupboard to nuclear proliferation of rogue nations. Most fascinating to me about these observations is that blame never solves the underlying problem. So over the past five years I launched a concerted effort to examine blame from a variety of perspectives. I chronicled its costs to individuals, families, organizations, and society at large. I researched blame’s cultural origins, its psychological underpinnings, and its situational influences. I analyzed how in a systemic universe blame is simply irrational. But most importantly I came to understand how by reducing blame we can displace its costs with positive outcomes for ourselves, our families, our workplaces, and our social institutions.

A few weeks ago I completed the draft manuscript of a book summarizing these findings and passed copies to a few select individuals for intense critical review. Consequently, the next few months will be consumed with editing, indexing, contracting for publication, and arranging distribution. But with any luck, Who’s to Blame? - the book, will be available to the public around the time the leaves drop from the trees and frost coats the pumpkins here in Wisconsin. At that time I hope to use this blog as a forum where readers can comment on contemporary issues related to blame, share personal experiences, and find ideas on how to reduce blame’s impact in their own lives.

In the meantime, the world of blame continues and perhaps we can begin to chip away at it here. (I just finished listening to a presidential press conference discussing the BP oil leak in the Gulf of Mexico and I can assure you blame is alive and well!) So I hope you will choose to be a regular visitor at this site, and to contribute your comments and ideas. If we all begin to unmask blame for the unproductive and destructive habit it truly is, then I have high hopes that, collectively, we can change the world for the better.